François Lacharité — Relational and Somatic Therapist

A Solitary Search, and What Finally Changed

I spent a long time searching on my own for something I eventually found in relationship.

For a long time, I believed change was mostly something I had to do on my own. I meditated, read a lot, tried to understand myself better, and did what it took to "improve."

There was something I hadn't yet seen: I was mostly looking, on my own, for a kind of peace that was much harder for me to actually live in my relationships.

Understanding helped me, up to a point, but it could also be a way of retreating into my head to avoid the vulnerability of being truly in contact with someone else.

I had learned to be very independent. To depend on others as little as possible. To withdraw or keep some distance when the relationship became more difficult.

It was in my relationships that I began to see more clearly how I protected myself: pulling away, closing down, and keeping my distance.

The change didn’t come from a new understanding, but from learning to stay more in contact and to say what was happening inside me when the relationship became difficult, rather than withdrawing or shutting down.

The Turning Point

Honest Sharing played an important role in that turning point. It asked me to make a conscious effort — and it still does. When the relationship becomes difficult, my tendency to retreat into my own world remains strong. I gradually learned to put words to my anger rather than act it out, to recognize my boundaries more clearly and express them. Over time, I also began to encounter more sadness and to discover more clearly my need for closeness.

The conflicts became shorter. We found our way back to each other more quickly after tension. I had less need to defend myself, took more responsibility for what was happening inside me, and felt more like myself in the relationship.

One of the things that affected me most were certain moments when there was nothing left to defend, understand, or fix. We were simply there, together, in a real connection.

That closeness had a quality I had been looking for elsewhere for a long time: a deep sense of ease, a kind of fullness in being deeply connected with someone. Not an extraordinary state, and not something to achieve.

What I Discovered Through Relationship

After searching on my own for so long, discovering this in relationship had a profound impact on me. Part of what I had been looking for through meditation, spirituality, personal growth, and the idea that I always needed to improve myself seemed to have something to do with something much simpler: being fully myself while remaining deeply connected with someone.

It made me want to understand more about what makes these moments possible — and to support other people in finding their own way through similar experiences.

My training then gave me a framework for understanding more clearly the ways we protect ourselves and how they can continue to shape our relationships, even when we already understand them very well.

It also taught me something essential: what helped me personally isn’t a recipe to apply to someone else. My work starts instead from what the person wants for themselves.

What Made Me Want to Support Others

Who I Am Today

Therapist training in progress — NARM Training Institute, London
Counselling Skills — University of Westminster
Certified Embodied Processing Practitioner (somatic approach)
Member of the Association des Naturothérapeutes du Québec (ANQ)
Member of the International Compliance Assurance for Holistic Practitioners (ICAHP)

Training and Professional Affiliations

Today, I work as a relational and somatic therapist.

My primary framework is NARM (NeuroAffective Relational Model), an approach to developmental trauma and attachment wounds. I am currently training as a therapist with the NARM Training Institute.

Honest Sharing, which I first discovered in my own life, remains an important complementary practice in my work, particularly when working with couples.

Embodied Processing also remains a foundation for the way I work, especially in the quality of presence and attention I bring to the body.

François has real depth, empathy, and presence, and you can feel that he is truly holding the whole of what you are saying and who you are. I felt completely safe to open up and allow myself to be genuinely seen. We heal through safe connections with people we trust, and this was certainly one of those moments.

— Maria F.

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Relational and Somatic Therapist
Online sessions · Montreal, Quebec
Email: contact@francoislacharite.com

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Professional Framework
Member of the International Compliance Assurance for Holistic Practitioners (ICAHP)
Member of the Association des Naturothérapeutes du Québec (ANQ)